I'm scared

It is Halloween.........OH THE HORROR!!!!!!!

"Sources: Bengals' Palmer likely won't return in 2008, but is delaying surgery"

Turns out his elbow is worse than we thought.

Scandinavians goin hog wild

In the 60's, John Lennon sang, "I once had a girl or should I say, she once had me." The name of the song? Norwegian Wood (from the best Beatles' album ever, Rubber Soul).

Picture it. It's 2008 in New York City and Heather and I are havin a brew. The place: The Hog Pit in the Meat Packing District. It's our third appearance.

We are looking good if I do say so myself. Heather is sporting a new shirt while I break in some new shoes. We just finished up a great meal at Vegetarian Paradise 2, that was indeed, a vegetarian's paradise.

The night starts rocky with an old Harley Davidson biker hitting on us. He actually diverted all of the cute boys away. He talked about his life which neither of us cared to hear...although a nice guy...we wanted someone a bit of our own age...and without a braided ponytail.

It was two boys from Sweden that ended up saving us. Now if you remember right, our second appearance brought us the Denmark boys. I'm beginning to think: Scandinavians love the Hog Pit.

It was a fun night. Full of jukeboxes, language deciphering and learning that cops don't carry guns in Sweden (they actually have to register for them). They were fun with cute accents. Got to love that.

But unfortunately for us, the boys had to head back. It was like John sang, "these birds have flown."



When in doubt, dance it out.

Thanks for the pic, mom!


6 degrees of Dane

So I am loving this fall weather. The crisp and chilly air causes me to basically oversleep a few minutes every morning for work, hence why I was again, running late this morning.

But...my lateness was a reward for my roomie (in a weird way that is). I saw Robert Kelly (he's in the blue jacket). Yeah, I didn't know his name either and probably wouldn't know his face if it weren't for my roomie. He's a comedian that went on the road with Dane Cook for the comedy tour, Tourgasm. While he smoked a cigerette and stood 5'0 or however tall he is this morning, it made me think: He knows Dane. He has Dane's number. My roomie loves Dane. I should've acted faster. But to be honest, only one side of my earphones work on my MP3 player and Dave was on. I was straining to hear "Two Step." I was distracted.

This post is an apology. I failed you roomie. I could've used my super hot "I'm-tired-and-don't-want-to-go-to-work" moves to get Dane's number for you. But I did not. I failed you.

Note: "Two Step" in only one ear is better than no "Two Step" at all.


Orange & Black...very scary

Want to know what is so scary about this Halloween in comparison to any other Halloween in past years? Get ready...sit down for this...the Bengals are....0-7!!!!


The orange & black (please note, these colors are often associated with Halloween in case you hadn't noticed) are scaring the crap of me! So scary that I shutter when I fall to sleep at night. Shutter that my poor New Year's Eve date has to go through that misery and that his brother has to take partial blame. Shutter that our fearless Bengal has become a scaredy cat (correct spelling, I googled it). Shutter that my boys only led 10% of the time in the 08' season which only counts for the Giants, Browns and Jets games because we never led in the other four games...SSS-CCCC-AAA-RRR-YYY!!(http://www.cincyjungle.com/2008/10/20/638666/update-bengals-led-only-10)only-10)

Our rookie linebacker Keith Rivers is out with a broken jaw. Carson has sat out two games with an elbow injury. We all know Carson and his troubles. He may even sit out for the Houston game this Sunday. Chills just thinking about it!!!

What's spooky as best is that my fantasy team is now 7-0...the exact opposite of my boys. Could it be that as I win each week, the Bengals are then doomed for success? Is my success hindering theirs?! Should I immediately end my future as a fantasy football champ to help them win a freakin game?!!!

I don't know about you...but I'm worked up! Why has Ocho Cinco (not Johnson) only had two touchdowns and T.J. only three? Why did we let Rudi go? Why did we take Henry back? Why can't our defense step up? Why hasn't Jordan called me?!! I'm scared alright.


Goonies never say die.

According to Variety, after kicking around the idea of a Goonies sequel fell through, director Richard Donner has been chasing a different spinoff idea: "I'm in the process of trying to get it done as a musical on Broadway. Wouldn't that be great?"

The director has already met with former Broadway entertainment attorney John F. Breglio, and Donner seems confident things are moving in the right direction. He's even figured out where to break for intermission: right after the kids fall through the hole, with the second half unfolding underground.

Say it ain't so?! No doubt you'll be able to buy a Baby Ruth at the concession stand of whatever house it ends up in.


New York is for insomniacs

What did insomniacs do before the internet? It's 6:00 am, and I am wide awake. It appears my experience with the bar crawl from last night didn't wear me out enough for a full night's rest...interesting.

Here's what kills me about being up this early on a Sunday when I had no intentions of being up this early on a Sunday: I will crash at noon when pre-game chatter begins. I will then go on to sleep through the first set of games and perhaps into the first quarter of the second set. I will then wake up, eat something really bad for me, and then proceed to lay around thinking about my wasted day and all of the things I could've done had I not woken up at 5:00 am.

In my previous life (IL, KY, GA), I would be eating a Totino's pizza right about now. Now, this is not the place where I can complain about lack of pizza options but let me say this. Totinos is the best $1.05 frozen pizza ever created. On my NYC budget, it is a beautiful meal full of cheesy goodness. However, I have yet to find a Totinos pizza in this city. That may be because the best slices are just around every street corner, but sometimes it's 6:30 am on a Sunday morning. Sometimes you just need that Totino's comfort in your freezer. I'm just sayin.

In happier news, Heather and I had a lot of fun on a bar crawl yesterday afternoon/last night. However, we didn't end the night on peanut butter cup perfection like we vowed to do...instead Heather stumbled into Duane Reade's for some Oreos and milk. Turns out her charm got her some free milk...at least that's what I think I remember her saying as I passed out to the end of SNL on our couch. Duane Read doesn't have soy milk and so I didn't participate in the oreo goodness, but promise I thought about it long and hard.

Oh yes....don't be jealous of that exciting New York life of ours.